 Malik
(10/29/04)
Well, I have been
saying this for quite a few weeks now, but once
again...sigh...things are going to be shorter than I would like them
to be. For those who didn't read my post yesterday, my master
hard drive crashed in the worst way (a physical crash in which the
drive is not functional, and it's probably dangerous to even attempt
to use). This too away about 10 hours that was going to be
spent on the site and on GTA:SA. So, for now, I'll post what I
can, and leave off the obvious bitch about how hard drives should be
made to stand up to their supposed abilities (they are supposed to
withstand a short fall when the power is off...well, this fall was
hella short and it killed the piece of shit). So, without
further ado, I'm Malik and I'm pissed off.
Nintendo?
Sexual?
Apparently, there
are some people (like
MSNBC.com) up in arms over the obviously sexual overtones
in the new DS commercials. I may be an idiot or something, but
I can't see the obvious sexual overtones of a screen filled with
static and two rectangles and a woman's voice starts saying that we
should touch the bottom rectangle. Ummm...the woman isn't
saying touch the square and I'll appear on the screen naked covered
with whipped cream as two midgets wrestle for dominance to decide
who does her with a goat. It's a woman's voice saying that we
should touch the bottom rectangle, which turns into the bottom
screen of the DS.
We live in a
society so over-sensitive to anything, especially since the
September 11th 2001 attacks, that we are pretty much told that
anything that is not 100% normal and expected is against our
society's morals and will only lead to our person descent into
hell. Well, rather than my moral demise, I see, from this
commercial, only a couple of things;
First of all...I
see a lot of static and very little visual stimulation (hold on,
before you say what I know you're thinking). I have one hell
of a short attention span, and a screen with static and two
rectangles...well, that doesn't get me excited (hold on...).
In fact, this style of advertising bores the crap out of me and
makes me, ever since I watch the commercial the first time, wish
that I had TiVo just for these crappy commercials.
Secondly, this
commercial doesn't get me stimulated in that way. I
mean, let's look at this commercial from a subjective
standpoint. There are two rectangles that are stacked
vertically (one on top of the other) while a woman's voice tells us
to touch the bottom rectangle. First of all, if this is
sexual, where (I beg for someone to explain) the hell is the sexual
content? Oh, wait! Maybe the rectangles represent
boobs! Yes, that's it! Two squar-ish chunks of screen on
a sea of static represent boobs...wait...no...that makes no freakin'
sense. Maybe it's because of the promise of sex if we touch
the rectangle...wait, there is no promise. In fact, there is
no sexual content to this commercial.
So, the reason
it's called sexual, being serious for a second, is because a woman
with a nice voice (a little too Star Trek computer sounding for me
to think of as being close to sexy...nerdy and sexy don't ever
really meet unless you write erotic fan-fics about Diana Crusher) is
asking us to touch something. Seriously, that is it.
There's no more. I wish there was, because this is so damned
retarded to act like Nintendo has betrayed the loyal army of
children who currently do their bidding over such a minor thing as a
woman telling us to touch our TV screen. So, what? If a
man's voice was involved, it wouldn't be sexual towards girls or
anything? DOUBLE-MOTHER-F@#%#ING STANDARDS! Sorry, I
hate it when we are supposed to be in an enlightened society and yet
we skill get up in arms over things that are nothing more than
retarded double standards.
Solution
Well, this one is
quite easy to say, and quite hard to get done...people need to look
around and then f&*$ off. It's that simple.
However, since I
need to stretch this out a little more, I'll explain. This is
a simple case of Puritan values resurfacing into what is supposed to
be a modern world. For example, the idea that anything
involving a woman is simply sinful and a cause of moral decay is an
antiquated notion that has no place in the 20th century (yes, I am
aware, but no one else seems to be, that we are in the 21st
century). In fact, the woman is only asking us to touch our
TVs, which is about as stupid of an advertising campaign one can
make (well, as dumb as the original pwN-Gage ads last year), is
simply a woman asking us to touch our TVs. Maybe, if you find
this sexual, you shouldn't write a news story on it, but rather call
a psychologist...or schedule a romantic get-away with you secret
fling...Ms. Plasma...Just don't let ghetto Zenith at home know about
this get-away...for the kids. So, as I said, you need to look
around (and see that if you find this commercial sexual, you have
some serious problems with what era you live in or with your ideas
of kinky, and how they involve electronics...you sick freak), and
then f$#% off.
Sony and Their
Love of Inferior Parts
So, over at
Gamespot.com, for this
weeks Rumor Control, there as an interesting blurb about the
newly designed PS2. I guess the rumor of the PSTwo (I'll just
call the newly designed one by that name for now, while the original
design is the PS2) is how it has USB2.0 instead of USB1.1 (like the
original PS2 has, from many, many years ago). Well,
considering how USB1.1 is no longer used or made for just about
anything, and how the USB2.0 technology is pretty commonplace, plus
with how Sony redesigned the PS2, you would think that a small
technological change could be implemented with no problems.
Right? In fact, to find these antiquated USB1.1 technology,
I'd expect that Sony would have to pay extra for parts since USB2.0
is the standard and also the low end of the working scale in today's
PCs.
The other big fact
is that USB2.0 can handle some massive storage devices with not a
problem. For example, USB2.0 could handle a hard drive without
any issues, at all. Meanwhile, to use an external storage
device, like a hard drive, on USB1.1 is a lot like playing Donky
Konga with a standard GCN control; it'll work, somewhat, but you
definitely will have some major problems and you won't enjoy it.
The hard drive
issue becomes rather key considering the PSTwo is too damned small
to hold a PS2 Hard Drive unit. This means that anyone who was
dumb enough to buy FFXI for the PS2 and actually trusts Sony's
quality is soon going to be searching rather hard for an old-school
PS2 (which will not be found on shelves marked as new anymore).
If the USB was boosted up to a modern acceptable standard (2.0),
then an external hard drive could be used to satisfy those who like
their FFXI or those who like the ability to load a game off their
hard drive for quicker access.
Sony, however, has
a rather shitty track record when it comes to the quality of their
parts. When the PS came out, it had less memory than an
average PC had 3 years earlier. Also, the PS was about as disposable
as a console could be; I personally burned through 4 of the damned
things. Then, with the PS2, there are the ever so infamous
DREs. In fact, the Disk Read Errors are so bad that, and this
many people don't even know about since Sony likes to keep their
blunders on the down-low, there was a class action law suit against
Sony on the shoddiness of the PS2. Sony has to repair a system
suffering from a DRE free of charge (not counting shipping and
handling).
Solution
The solution is
quite simple and to the point. Sony needs to stop f^%#ing
around when it comes to their consoles. If you want high
quality sounds components, TVs, computers, etc, you can look to
Sony. They are always near the cutting edge on everything
electronic and entertainment related. So, I can't help but
wonder why the Playstation and Playstation 2 are the exceptions to
the rule.
The PS and PS2 are
both made with inferior parts, substandard quality, and are about as
sturdy as a glass vase. So, if Sony is going to take the time
and effort to re-design their console and to go through the effort
of finding some new parts to fit in this smaller, re-designed
console, then why don't they look into buying some quality parts for
a change. Hell, to buy 3 year old parts is bad enough when the
PS2 or PS1 were both new, but now to re-design the PSTwo and keep
pumping in 7 or 8 year old technology is ridiculous. It's nice
to know Sony cares (about ripping my every last dollar out of my
hand).
Conclusion
Like I said, I
have no choice but to keep things short this week. For once
I'm on vacation and I'm actually putting in a good effort, and what
happens...my PC dies. Well, I was planning to discuss, just a
little, the newly announced plans of Sony to release the PSP on the
12th of December in Japan (still no solid release date in the
US). It's funny to see Sony actually rush out their handheld
when it's quite obvious that things are just not really ready for a
full release (especially in regard to the UMD). Sadly, that
will have to wait until next Friday (assuming I can remember it in
my short attention span). Anyway, I need to catch up on some
GTA:SA time that I've lost while repairing my PC. Anyway,
feel free to write
me or put it on the forums,
if you think you've got something to add.
Malik
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