Malik  (10/29/04)

Well, I have been saying this for quite a few weeks now, but once again...sigh...things are going to be shorter than I would like them to be.  For those who didn't read my post yesterday, my master hard drive crashed in the worst way (a physical crash in which the drive is not functional, and it's probably dangerous to even attempt to use).  This too away about 10 hours that was going to be spent on the site and on GTA:SA.  So, for now, I'll post what I can, and leave off the obvious bitch about how hard drives should be made to stand up to their supposed abilities (they are supposed to withstand a short fall when the power is off...well, this fall was hella short and it killed the piece of shit).  So, without further ado, I'm Malik and I'm pissed off.

Nintendo?  Sexual?

Apparently, there are some people (like up in arms over the obviously sexual overtones in the new DS commercials.  I may be an idiot or something, but I can't see the obvious sexual overtones of a screen filled with static and two rectangles and a woman's voice starts saying that we should touch the bottom rectangle.  Ummm...the woman isn't saying touch the square and I'll appear on the screen naked covered with whipped cream as two midgets wrestle for dominance to decide who does her with a goat.  It's a woman's voice saying that we should touch the bottom rectangle, which turns into the bottom screen of the DS.

We live in a society so over-sensitive to anything, especially since the September 11th 2001 attacks, that we are pretty much told that anything that is not 100% normal and expected is against our society's morals and will only lead to our person descent into hell.  Well, rather than my moral demise, I see, from this commercial, only a couple of things;

First of all...I see a lot of static and very little visual stimulation (hold on, before you say what I know you're thinking).  I have one hell of a short attention span, and a screen with static and two rectangles...well, that doesn't get me excited (hold on...).  In fact, this style of advertising bores the crap out of me and makes me, ever since I watch the commercial the first time, wish that I had TiVo just for these crappy commercials.

Secondly, this commercial doesn't get me stimulated in that way.  I mean, let's look at this commercial from a subjective standpoint.  There are two rectangles that are stacked vertically (one on top of the other) while a woman's voice tells us to touch the bottom rectangle.  First of all, if this is sexual, where (I beg for someone to explain) the hell is the sexual content?  Oh, wait!  Maybe the rectangles represent boobs!  Yes, that's it!  Two squar-ish chunks of screen on a sea of static represent makes no freakin' sense.  Maybe it's because of the promise of sex if we touch the rectangle...wait, there is no promise.  In fact, there is no sexual content to this commercial.

So, the reason it's called sexual, being serious for a second, is because a woman with a nice voice (a little too Star Trek computer sounding for me to think of as being close to sexy...nerdy and sexy don't ever really meet unless you write erotic fan-fics about Diana Crusher) is asking us to touch something.  Seriously, that is it.  There's no more.  I wish there was, because this is so damned retarded to act like Nintendo has betrayed the loyal army of children who currently do their bidding over such a minor thing as a woman telling us to touch our TV screen.  So, what?  If a man's voice was involved, it wouldn't be sexual towards girls or anything?  DOUBLE-MOTHER-F@#%#ING STANDARDS!  Sorry, I hate it when we are supposed to be in an enlightened society and yet we skill get up in arms over things that are nothing more than retarded double standards.


Well, this one is quite easy to say, and quite hard to get done...people need to look around and then f&*$ off.  It's that simple.

However, since I need to stretch this out a little more, I'll explain.  This is a simple case of Puritan values resurfacing into what is supposed to be a modern world.  For example, the idea that anything involving a woman is simply sinful and a cause of moral decay is an antiquated notion that has no place in the 20th century (yes, I am aware, but no one else seems to be, that we are in the 21st century).  In fact, the woman is only asking us to touch our TVs, which is about as stupid of an advertising campaign one can make (well, as dumb as the original pwN-Gage ads last year), is simply a woman asking us to touch our TVs.  Maybe, if you find this sexual, you shouldn't write a news story on it, but rather call a psychologist...or schedule a romantic get-away with you secret fling...Ms. Plasma...Just don't let ghetto Zenith at home know about this get-away...for the kids.  So, as I said, you need to look around (and see that if you find this commercial sexual, you have some serious problems with what era you live in or with your ideas of kinky, and how they involve sick freak), and then f$#% off.

Sony and Their Love of Inferior Parts

So, over at, for this weeks Rumor Control, there as an interesting blurb about the newly designed PS2.  I guess the rumor of the PSTwo (I'll just call the newly designed one by that name for now, while the original design is the PS2) is how it has USB2.0 instead of USB1.1 (like the original PS2 has, from many, many years ago).  Well, considering how USB1.1 is no longer used or made for just about anything, and how the USB2.0 technology is pretty commonplace, plus with how Sony redesigned the PS2, you would think that a small technological change could be implemented with no problems.  Right?  In fact, to find these antiquated USB1.1 technology, I'd expect that Sony would have to pay extra for parts since USB2.0 is the standard and also the low end of the working scale in today's PCs.

The other big fact is that USB2.0 can handle some massive storage devices with not a problem.  For example, USB2.0 could handle a hard drive without any issues, at all.  Meanwhile, to use an external storage device, like a hard drive, on USB1.1 is a lot like playing Donky Konga with a standard GCN control; it'll work, somewhat, but you definitely will have some major problems and you won't enjoy it.

The hard drive issue becomes rather key considering the PSTwo is too damned small to hold a PS2 Hard Drive unit.  This means that anyone who was dumb enough to buy FFXI for the PS2 and actually trusts Sony's quality is soon going to be searching rather hard for an old-school PS2 (which will not be found on shelves marked as new anymore).  If the USB was boosted up to a modern acceptable standard (2.0), then an external hard drive could be used to satisfy those who like their FFXI or those who like the ability to load a game off their hard drive for quicker access.

Sony, however, has a rather shitty track record when it comes to the quality of their parts.  When the PS came out, it had less memory than an average PC had 3 years earlier.  Also, the PS was about as disposable as a console could be; I personally burned through 4 of the damned things.  Then, with the PS2, there are the ever so infamous DREs.  In fact, the Disk Read Errors are so bad that, and this many people don't even know about since Sony likes to keep their blunders on the down-low, there was a class action law suit against Sony on the shoddiness of the PS2.  Sony has to repair a system suffering from a DRE free of charge (not counting shipping and handling).


The solution is quite simple and to the point.  Sony needs to stop f^%#ing around when it comes to their consoles.  If you want high quality sounds components, TVs, computers, etc, you can look to Sony.  They are always near the cutting edge on everything electronic and entertainment related.  So, I can't help but wonder why the Playstation and Playstation 2 are the exceptions to the rule.

The PS and PS2 are both made with inferior parts, substandard quality, and are about as sturdy as a glass vase.  So, if Sony is going to take the time and effort to re-design their console and to go through the effort of finding some new parts to fit in this smaller, re-designed console, then why don't they look into buying some quality parts for a change.  Hell, to buy 3 year old parts is bad enough when the PS2 or PS1 were both new, but now to re-design the PSTwo and keep pumping in 7 or 8 year old technology is ridiculous.  It's nice to know Sony cares (about ripping my every last dollar out of my hand).


Like I said, I have no choice but to keep things short this week.  For once I'm on vacation and I'm actually putting in a good effort, and what PC dies.  Well, I was planning to discuss, just a little, the newly announced plans of Sony to release the PSP on the 12th of December in Japan (still no solid release date in the US).  It's funny to see Sony actually rush out their handheld when it's quite obvious that things are just not really ready for a full release (especially in regard to the UMD).  Sadly, that will have to wait until next Friday (assuming I can remember it in my short attention span).  Anyway, I need to catch up on some GTA:SA time that I've lost while repairing my PC.  Anyway,  feel free to write me or put it on the forums, if you think you've got something to add.